“Freeing yourself was one thing, claiming ownership of that freed self was another.” Toni Morrison
Marriage is the riskiest decision that anyone could take and nobody wants to end it badly but there are times when getting out of the marriage seems to be the best solution for both partners. Some decide to get divorced on mutual terms while some fight for it. It is the adults who make this decision but the ones who get the most affected by this decision are the children.
Even though a divorce affects children of every age group, teens have been observed to be most affected by the separation of their parents. From escaping academics to avoiding social companies; teens go through a great change of personality due to the separation of their parents.
How Teenagers Deal With Divorce:
Results suggest that parental divorce significantly increased the probability of risky behaviors in their children. Moreover, many of these adverse impacts persisted over time, especially among teenage girls. Children have to go through the fate their parents have decided for them.
“Divorce is a journey that the children involved do not ask to take. They are forced along for a ride where the results are dictated by the road their parents decide to travel.” Diane Greene
No matter how much one tries to talk to teens and tell them how this divorce is not going to change their lives at all, still; it is going to impact them. You can tell them all you want that their parents are still going to love them the same but this clash does stay in their minds forever. Teens and adults can take Dissertation Help London-based services or essay writing UK-based assistance to do well in their studies but there are some prominent mental and physical traumas that they go through. Following are a few of the commonly observed impacts on teens because of their parent’s decision to divorce;
1. Mental Effect:
Following are some of the main mental effects that are observed in teens coming from divorced houses:
Teens are often seen getting depressed because of their parent’s divorce. They start to feel like they are not loved enough, they start to lack self-esteem, and consider themselves lesser than others.
Scared Of Forming Relationships:
Teens get scared of building strong relations or having a strong connection with other people in fear of it getting broken the same way their parents got separated. So; even when they feel attached to someone, they try to move away from him/her to not give space for any strong connection.
Mostly; teens can’t digest the fact that their parents got separated and from now on; they will be living between two different homes. This gives them continuous stress which also causes them trouble sleeping.
2. Physical And Behavioral Effects:
Similarly; changes in behavior and physical activities are also observed; like;
Some teens express their depression and anxiety by venting out extreme anger either on one or both of their parents.
Teens start to spend more time out with their friends or with strangers rather than with their families. They try to escape the ongoing events in their homes staying outside of them.
When children coming from divorce households already have so many personal issues going on then it is only natural for their focus to start getting diverted from their studies. The sudden divorces have shown poor academic performance in teens.
Some teens start to stop socializing at all, especially at family gatherings, and lock themselves in their rooms in a fear of having to face the world. They feel ashamed of the fact that their parents got separated.
How To Deal With Teens Who Come From Divorced Households?
Even though; a divorce can leave adverse effects on teens but it is not impossible to deal with those problems and help teens come out of them. Parents need to make sure that their children still feel as protected as they were before separation. As Lisa Hayen said; “I strongly believe children can thrive through a divorce. Children need parents who love them. Children need to know they are safe. Children need stability and sometimes that’s much easier to achieve outside marriage than in a broken one.”
Try to avoid fights or arguments in front of your children. They are already devastated enough, they don’t want to hear any more of those arguments.
Don’t ever break the promise that you have made to your children because it will leave a negative impression of you on them. They won’t feel loved enough.
When a parent is depressed or acts sad, then it takes a toll on the health of a child as well. This is why parents should try to stay happy and normal in front of children.
Don’t ever let your commitments come in between your and your child’s relationship. Give time to them even after being moved to separate houses because it is the parent’s love and time they seek more than any other thing.
Your child is adult enough to know the seriousness of the problem so don’t try to hide it from them and explain everything honestly to the children.
Let your children express their feelings; do not tell them to keep quiet as it will otherwise result in anger and anxiety.
Don’t Abuse Your Partner:
Never ever abuse or disrespect your partner in front of your children even after getting divorced because you might not be partners anymore but you still are the parents of the child.
Teenagers go through mixed emotions when their parents decide to divorce. Prominent change in their behavior and mental health is observed. This behavior coming from teens is quite natural and they must be handled with love and all the attention. Hopefully; the above-mentioned post will help the readers understand the behavioral changes seen in teens due to their parent’s divorce and the ways to deal with them.